


A Love Story (too good to be true)

by Nivelle



Series: Pretending, right [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Actors, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-08-10 00:40:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20126503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nivelle/pseuds/Nivelle
Summary: Bucky and Steve both need some good press. And what would be better news than a love story?





	1. A plum cake worthy plan

**Author's Note:**

> This is just to get back into writing after a two month break. My focus is getting the words out and not constantly stop and edit everything. So far it seems to be the right approach, because I'm already beyond the word count I wanted to reach.
> 
> It's based on prompt 21 from [this list here](https://www.pillowfort.social/posts/328763) and I love this trope which is why I'm planning on writing more of those. We'll see.
> 
> Also I feel like I should apologize for the Star Trek references. The very specific one will be explained at the end of this chapter.

Sunlight is flooding Peggy’s office high above the city. It’s warm and cozy and Steve hasn’t slept in what feels like years. He sinks deeper into the sofa Peggy ordered him to sit on and listen right after she closed the door behind them. At least the first part of that he had managed to do. The second part, well… he is aware that she’s talking, but he just can’t focus on the meaning of the words she throws at him.

“Steve!” The word cuts through the fog in his mind.

“Yes?” He desperately tries to sit upright but the sofa seems to be determined to eat him.

Peggy sighs. “You didn’t hear a word I just said.”

“I’m sorry.” He really is. Peggy is not just his publicist (which alone should be a good enough reason to listen to her after she made him come to her office), she’s also someone he highly respects and certainly would want to be friends with if he weren’t her client and Peggy very strict about separating her professional from her private life. “I didn’t get much sleep last night.”

“Obviously.” Peggy grabs a newspaper page and holds it right in front of his face, almost too close for him to read. Still, the headline is hard to miss: _Captain America attacking fan._ Underneath a picture of Steve in his costume as Captain America looking grimly into the camera. “Because apparently you were too busy punching people.”

“He’s a homophobic jerk, he had it coming the minute he opened his mouth”, Steve says a bit louder than necessary, the anger from that night boiling up again, pushing the fatigue out of his system.

“Maybe. But that’s not what’s out there in the world. Your truth doesn’t count when hundreds of people already believe something else.” She puts the paper back on the pile on her desk that’s probably labeled _Steve Rogers being stupid_. “Add this to the other _incidents_ and you are in serious trouble. You can’t walk around punching people and calling them Nazis in public. Not to forget about being arrested for trespassing and standing too close to fresh graffiti with paint on your hands.”

“There was a swastika on the wall underneath. I didn’t have a choice.”

Peggy sighs. “You know that I am far from condemning those actions. But for publicity they are a nightmare, when everyone only knows what they read in some sort of media headline somewhere and all that sticks is what you did, not why you did it.”

“But I can’t just sit on my hands when things like that happen, Peggy.”

“Yes, well, that’s the reason I am saving my lecture on how to behave as a beloved movie star for my next client.”

Steve frowns. “Why did you ask me to come see you then?”

Peggy finally takes a seat in the chair in front of him so they’re almost at eye level. “We are going to take a different approach to improve your public image.”

Something in her tone makes his alarms go off. “And what approach are you thinking about?”, he asks carefully, suspecting another extra charity event. He tries to avoid those. Standing next to super rich people congratulating themselves on their generosity, giving money to good causes only to show off their wealth, playing nice surrounded by people he hates. It’s the most effective punishment for the extra work he causes Peggy has ever found.

She smiles at him. It’s not a friendly smile. It’s the smile of a dragon about to conquer the castle of its dreams. “What you need right now is good press. I’ve been talking to Natasha Romanov, the publicist of James Barnes. As you might know he went through a rather messy break-up recently.”

Of course Steve knows about that. Not only was it the number one topic for weeks but he had been working with Bucky while Brock Rumlow gave one interview after the other, throwing with dirt and private information while paining himself as a saint. There had been armies of lawyers involved on both sides. Bucky never really talked about it on set, throwing himself into work, but there was no way to ignore the phone calls and Bucky’s exasperated voice answering them.

“Both of you need the press to focus on something different about you, especially with the premiere of _Captain America - The Return of the Winter Soldier_ coming up. If we don’t find something else to feed the press, they’ll just reheat the stories of you attacking random citizens and Barnes’ breaking Rumlow’s heart -”, she holds up her hand to stop Steve from interrupting, “I know that’s not what you did and I doubt Rumlow even has a heart, but that doesn’t matter.”

Peggy really knows him too well, that would have been Steve’s argument. He bites back the words and snorts in agreement instead.

“So Natasha and I thought it would benefit the both of you if we got the story out that you fell in love on set with each other.” Peggy is still smiling.

S teve stares at her. He is pretty sure he misheard. “Wait, what?”

“We want to spread the story that you and Barnes fell in love while shooting the last movie together”, Peggy explains patiently. “It’s not that big a deal since both of you are already out as bisexual or gay respectively, so that’s one thing we don’t have to worry about as much. You’re both single and you have great chemistry together.”

“You seriously want us to be dating each other? That’s your solution to this?”

“Yes”, Peggy simply says.

Steve lets himself slump back into the sofa. To his disappointment the cushions do not manage to swallow him entirely.  It’s not that pretending to date Bucky would be hard.  He always liked Bucky. Working with him was easy and more often than not fun. He’d even go as far as to say they’re work friends – enjoying each others company on set and during interviews but falling out of touch in the interim.  But for an actor, he’s always been bad at pretending and even worse at lying. “ Is there an alternative?”

“Sure. You can sit in hotel rooms and discuss why exactly you have no respect for rules and how Captain America is a role model for kids anyway.”

Steve  groans . “I’m sure everyone would love that.”

“What do you think about the idea?”, Steve asks Bucky as they find a table in the corner of the small café Bucky had suggested when they agreed to meet. It’s funny, Steve thinks, they’ve known each other for over three years now and live in the same city, but never spent time together in private. He even knew the café from passing it, it’s not that far away from his apartment.

Bucky’s eyes are trained on the napkin he is folding. “I think it might work.”

“Does that mean you’d do it?”

Still focused on the napkin (now vaguely shaped like the bow tie of a clown) Bucky shrugs. “Better than talking about my real life.”

“Yeah, no. I’m sorry.” He feels like an idiot. Of course Bucky would rather talk about a fictional happy relationship than what happened with Rumlow. This whole plan was probably mostly for Bucky’s benefit, Steve was just a convenient participant in it. “If you’re in, I’m in.”

Now Bucky does look up with a frown on his face. “You don’t have to do this.”

“But I do, according to Peggy.”

Bucky doesn’t seem to quite believe him but eventually nods. “Okay. Then we’re doing this.” He continues to fiddle with his napkin, which is barely the shape of a napkin anymore.

Steve smiles at him with more confidence than he actually feels. “It’s going to be fine. We’ll just need to be convincing until all the other stuff’s blown over. We are actors. We can do this.” He is talking more to himself than to Bucky.

“Yeah, actors”, Bucky repeats flatly. Then he shifts, suddenly, like the words reminded him that he makes a living out of being someone else. The tension falls from his body, he sits taller but like he actually wants to be here, not like he’s ready to melt into the ground within seconds. He looks up from his fingers that are still busy with the napkin and hits Steve with a smile that’s pure sunlight. “Hi, darling. It’s nice to be on a date with you.”

“Hi”, Steve stammers, blindsided by the abrupt change and the smile and the pet name. He can feel himself blushing. “Hi, sweetheart. I’m happy you could make it.”

“But of course, honey.” Bucky is visibly enjoying this. “Here, I’ve got you a flower.”

He holds up the napkin that now really looks a bit like a hydrangea. Steve takes it carefully and places it on the table in front of him. “It’s beautiful, my t’hy’la.”

Bucky stares at him incredulously for a moment, then he almost falls off his chair laughing. “God, you’re such a dork. I can’t believe I agreed to date you.”

Steve grins at him. He hasn’t felt that happy in a long time. “I was running out of names to call you!”, he defends halfheartedly.

Bucky just nods, still grinning. “Yeah, alright, Spock. I’m gonna get a new napkin and a coffee. Do you want something?”

“Coffee’d be great, thanks.” Steve hesitates, than adds: “Jim.”

Bucky looks torn between laughing and hitting his forehead on the table. In the end he just groans and walks off towards the counter, shaking his head at Steve’s idiotic sense of humor. Steve leans back in his seat, very pleased with himself. It takes him a minute to realize that he hasn’t seen Bucky openly laugh since the first _Captain America_ movie. The thought feels heavy and sad, because Bucky deserves all the happiness in the world, but at the same time makes something inside him glow with pride.

“One cappuccino with extra chocolate”, Bucky announces, placing the beverage in front of Steve. Foam spills onto the table surface. “And plum cake.” A tray with to plates and what must be Bucky’s coffee gets set next to Steve’s cup. “It’s the best thing in the world. And don’t you dare say you’re on a diet, because this clearly falls under the pizza-exception.”

The pizza-exception is a concept Steve came up with during one particularly hard day on set. They had been standing in the mud and rain for hours and chicken and soggy vegetables (which in an earlier life might have been broccoli) were not helping at all. So in order to keep the mood on set somewhere approaching civil, they’d ordered pizza. (Not anywhere near the amounts of pizza to be truly satisfying, but enough to remember that there was something good left in the world.) Over time the concept was widened out to encompass a variation of other situations where such a reminder was necessary and all kinds of comfort food. Apparently including plum cake as of now.

“Is pretending to date me so bad that it calls for plum cake?” Steve jokes, lifting his cup with caution as to not spill any more coffee. If Bucky mumbles something like “you have no idea” under his breath, he is definitely too focused on his coffee to notice. Not that he’d want Bucky to want to date him, but it still stings a bit.

“The list Natasha gave me calls for plum cake”, Bucky says, handing Steve his phone with said list opened. It doesn’t have a title. “Things we need to talk about if we choose to fake date. Which we have.”

The list isn’t very long and covers the basics. The majority of it is about them coming up with a consistent story about their dating history, but it also includes a note to make sure they’re on the same page concerning physical displays of affection. It ends in bright red, all caps handwriting: _Whatever you do, tell me!!!_

“Okay.” Steve puts his cup back down and licks the overflown coffee off his fingers. “Did you ask me out? With everything going on in your life during the last movie… I don’t think me asking you for a date would’ve been something you needed.”

Bucky nods slowly. “That makes sense, yes. We had just wrapped and I asked you out that day because I didn’t want to make things awkward if you’d say no.”

“I said yes, though. And we went for Italian food the next week.”

“Thursday. We had pizza. And ice cream. And then ended up watching Star Trek IV.”

“The best Star Trek movie,” Steve interjects.

“That’s not a very high bar”, Bucky says and impales a plum with his fork. “But you are the expert. Did we call it a night after that?”

“Maybe another movie because we didn’t want it to end yet?” Steve suggests. It’s odd, planning a date that never happened in hindsight with Bucky. Especially because this sounds exactly like the kind of date he’d want to have with him after a long and exhausting shoot: comfortable and familiar, most likely filled with bad jokes and ideally a lot of cuddling. Ridiculously domestic. “Maybe a disney one? Aristocats?”

He remembers Bucky singing a song from that movie because he thought it was just perfect. Bucky essentially was a cat in human form.

Said cat smiles. “Yeah. I love that one.” He hesitates, pausing the next fork full of cake midair staring at it. “Would it be okay if I kissed you that night?”, Bucky asks the piece of plum and dough softly.

Steve can feel his heart melt a bit. God, they’d already agreed they were in love at this point and Bucky was still making sure Steve was okay with what happened. With what might have happened in an alternate universe in which they fell in love with each other and went on a date.

“I think I would have liked that”, Steve answers finally when the cake remains silent. It takes him usually longer to reach that point – maybe he’s slow, maybe he believes in finding the perfect moment for a first kiss – but that doesn’t really matter now, does it? Hypothetical him has been in love with Bucky for months before that date, so he’d have had enough time to mentally prepare for the idea of kissing Bucky. Of course, kissing Bucky wouldn’t be hardship at all. Not only is he beautiful and charming, but Steve also knows him to be funny and kind and caring and always giving his all for what he believes is important. A little too late he realizes that he is staring at Bucky’s lips (full and bitten red, a few stray crumbs in the corner of his mouth). Bucky watches him with an unreadable expression. Steve clears his throat, averting his gaze because he can’t eat his piece of plum cake without looking at it, can’t he?

“Okay”, Bucky says sounding like the professional Steve absolutely is not about this. “That’s good. So we’ve got the first date and the first kiss story worked out. That should be enough, don’t you think?”

Steve nods, his mouth full of cake. His face still feels warmer than usual and he takes extra care not to look at Bucky’s lips again.

“Okay. I’ll call Natasha because she’ll kill me if I don’t.” Bucky takes his phone from the table. “If I’m not back in a few minutes, please come rescue me?”

“Sure, princess”, Steve replies trying to go back to the lighthearted mood of the pre-plum-cake-worthy part of their meeting. It doesn’t feel quite right, but thankfully Bucky goes along with it.

“Thank you, my knight in shining armour.”

“It’s my honor, your highness.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> T'hy'la is Vulcan and essentially means friend, brother or lover. Spock uses it for Jim Kirk.


	2. Do as you are told

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Bucky gets ready (or attempts to). And Natasha really only wants the best for Bucky (he has serious doubts about that, though).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It keeps growing... and I thought this would be done in a 5k one shot. Ha.  
On the upside, there are little to none star trek references in this chapter. I'm counting that as a win.

“That’s a good story”, Natasha says, sounding pleased, after Bucky gave her a summery of his and Steve’s fake dating history. “Maybe make the next date a bit more romantic than just pizza and a movie. Take him to a nice restaurant, you know, where they have candles and table cloths and expect you to use cutlery instead of your hands.”

Bucky sighs. “Sure. Any other notes on my fictitious dating life?”

“Take pictures and post a cute one on your social media”, Natasha answers the rhetorical question without hesitation. “Show it to me first, though. I’ll help you with the caption.”

“Wait, you want me to have a date with Steve?” He just barely manages to keep his voice down. It still shoots up an octave or two. But at least no one except Natasha heard it. Which is already bad enough.

She snorts and he can see her smirk through the phone. “He is officially your boyfriend. That’s what people who are dating do.” Her voice softens. “You can just go to a nice place, have dinner, hang out as friends and then act for five seconds like you’re a couple for a photo. It’s not complicated. You can do that. I know you can.”

Natasha’s tone is decisive enough that Bucky doesn’t dare to object. This doesn’t mean that he strongly disagrees with her though.

“I still can’t hear you nod, James”, she admonishes him.

Bucky grimaces. “That’s because I didn’t”, he shoots back.

“James.”

“Yes.”

“Great. Now go back to your Mr Lavender and ask him out on a proper date.”

The call disconnects before he has the chance to argue. Bucky pockets the phone and walks back to the table where Steve is still sitting, his own phone lying in front of him on the table. He looks up with an open smile when Bucky moves closer.

“What did Natasha say?”

Bucky’s brain seems to short circuit for a moment then, he assumes that’s thanks to combination of the conversation with Natasha and Steve smiling at him.

“Will you go on a real date with me?”, he blurts out, still standing next to his chair, only realizing what he said when he hears the words come out.

Steve stares at him looking utterly confused. Shit. Bucky can feel himself blush. His cheeks are probably the color of a ripe tomato right now.

“I mean not a _real_ real date of course”, he says hastily. “Natasha just said we should have dinner and take some couple-y pictures and make it look like we’re actually dating.” Smooth save, Barnes. You are doing amazing.

“So, umm...” Bucky realizes he’s still standing and sits down, almost missing the chair in the process. “Would that be okay with you? Dinner?”

How could Steve possibly say no to that?

The answer is very simple: because there really is no other option.

Which is precisely what Bucky tries to remind himself of over the next fifty-two hours and thirty-six minutes. Not that he’s counting. He just happens to look at a clock every now and then. Like a normal person with stuff scheduled. It’s not his fault that he has still a couple of days off until the first interviews for the new _Captain America_ movie. (Although, it really is. But he is not yet desperate enough to go and pay his dentist the prophylactic visit he’s been avoiding for two years now.)

Bucky also tries to remember that this is not a _date_ date, but a dinner between friends who pretend to be dating to distract from their real private lives. So there is nothing to be nervous about.

In theory. In reality it’s still two hours before he has to leave to be on time and the heap of rejected clothing choices has become unstable due to its height. Bucky picks up the two shirts that have fallen onto the bedroom floor – a plain black t-shirt and a red henley – and sighs. This shouldn’t be that hard. It’s not even a real date.

Maybe that’s the problem, though. Or at least part of it. They have to look the part when they take the pictures. This would be so much easier if it were a real date. Bucky ignores the tiny voice in his head that insists on repeating _no, it wouldn’t_ every time he comes to that conclusion. Like the thirty-seven previous times today he refuses to argue with it. It would only lead him into admitting that he might have had a crush on Steve since he first met him at the audition for the first _Captain America _movie and that a crush that lived that long might actually be more than just a crush. Which is something Bucky does decidedly not want to think about ninety-four minutes before he has to have a fake date with Steve.

_Fuck_ . Now he is thinking about it. If he had been antsy before, his nervousness makes him now feel like he is turning into ice cold stone from the inside out while sinking into a pool of lava. This whole plan was a horrible idea from the beginning. He should never have agreed to this.  Honestly, Bucky had assumed Steve would never agree to this. Other than Bucky, Steve has no qualms about discussing his nonprofessional activities (or PR-disasters as Peggy calls them), especially not when they afford him the opportunity to speak publicly about racism, xenophobia, homophobia and  the effects of pure capitalism (causing a few more PR-emergencies in the process).  So Steve got probably pressured into this fake dating thing by his publicist, who  needed a bit of a brake. A very well deserved brake in Bucky’s opinion. He has been in Steve’s orbit long enough to know how few of Steve’s outbursts of righteousness actually find their way into public. It’s impressive.  He has nothing but respect for Peggy Carter. Although her involvement in this  _fake a relationship to have something else to talk about than your actual lives that are giving your overworked publicists a headache-Plan_ makes him like her a little bit less. But not as much as Natasha, because Natasha knows about Bucky’s crush on Steve but is cruel enough to make them go on a romantic fake date together.

Bucky’s phone rings. He is absolutely not surprised to see Natasha’s name on the display.

“You are mean”, he informs her as a greeting out of his thought process.

“Only if I find it appropriate”, Natasha answers unperturbed. “Am I interrupting something?”

Bucky looks at the two shirts he is still holding in his hand. “No.”

“So you’re not yet freaking out over what to wear?”

“No. I haven’t even… I mean I’ve still got an hour.” Shit. Only an hour left. And he needs to find something other to wear than the sweats and the old t-shirt he has currently on. Bucky eyes the heap on his bed with disdain. Even if he finds something in there, with his luck it will probably be completely wrinkled by now.

“That’s good, I was hoping I wouldn’t be too late.” Her voice makes it clear that she knows he lied. “We’ve decided, since you’ll need to take pictures, that it’d be best if we coordinated what you’ll be wearing. We want those pictures to look good, right?”

“Right”, Bucky repeats automatically. Pictures of Steve and him as a couple. How could he forget to include that into his minor panic attack? It doesn’t really matter, he can feel a new one coming up with special emphasis on that.

Thankfully Natasha gives him something else to focus on. “Okay. You do have black jeans, right?”

“Yes.” Bucky moves to dig on his bed. His favorite one was one of the first options he had abandoned there. Too… he doesn’t even remember what.

“Good. Do you have a nice gray sweater?”

Bucky has. In fact, he just threw it on the floor in pursuit of the jeans. “Yes.”

“Great. Now take a shower, get dressed and enjoy yourself”, Natasha orders. “You get to have a date with the man of your dreams”, she adds in a sing-song voice that, coming from her, is truly terrifying before she disconnects the call.

Bucky let’s out a few selective curses and then does as he’s told.


	3. Just like a movie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they have their fake date.

Not even the restaurant had been their choice. Steve shifts awkwardly in his seat – a very nice, very antique looking wooden chair with cr ea m-colored cushions. It’s actually quite comfortable but that doesn’t help.  He is restless and annoyed by how wrong everything feels about this – like they are characters in a movie and aware of it.  (Maybe Wade behaves the way he does because he constantly lives under that impression. It would certainly explain a lot. And if Steve weren’t convinced that this is real, not a movie, just a uncomfortable lie about his life, he would be more than tempted to address the fourth wall right about now.)

Peggy or Natasha, whoever managed to get them a table here in one of those restaurants where you either have to wait months or know someone who knows someone, has excellent taste. If Steve were to choose a location for a romantic dinner scene, he couldn’t imagine anything more perfect. It’s beautiful.  Dark wood, off-white tablecloths and cushions, napkins color-coordinated with the flowers on their respective table, the light bright enough to actually see what you are eating but warm and not blinding.  And of course there is a candle on the table Steve has been led to.  How could there be not.

His hands twitch to play with the napkin, but it’s folded into such a complicated sculpture he is afraid of destroying it. It’s a stupid notion, he’ll have to unfold it later to use it anyway, but for now he needs the illusion to stay intact. If he has to live in a fake world where he doesn’t even get to choose his own clothes for a date in his free time, that’s the least he can do. Keep the illusion of this love story he and Bucky are supposed to have perfect enough, movie-like enough, that people will want to believe in it.  If he thinks perfect relationships are impossible to believe in because they don’t exist in his world, doesn’t count, because, according to Peggy, not everyone is such a cynical avenging angel. Whatever  _ that _ is supposed to mean.

A  shadow falls over the napkin-sculpture and he hears Bucky say “Hi, sorry I’m late” while taking his seat  like he belonged in this environment. Which he probably did, being a movie star and all. But in that light, so was Steve, only that Steve still felt very pretentious and everything but himself  when he was wearing cloths worth a nurse’s work of four months, having dinner in a fancy restaurant he never had thought to see from the inside as a guest one day. It wasn’t that he felt like he didn ’ t deserve it (or not only, because why was pretending to punch aliens worth more money than saving lives and taking care of people?). It’s more a feeling of playing a role  he had been cast in by accident. Funny enough, this particular dinner is part of a performance. With that in mind, Steve forces himself to focus on Bucky. On his not-date date. And maybe, just maybe, it would have been safer to just think about how this part of his life is all about keeping up appearances, playing a role and stuff, because Steve certainly is not ready for  _ this _ .

_ This _ is not necessarily Bucky wearing a sweater that makes his eyes even brighter than usual and shows of f his physique (which is  more lean than when they were filming but Steve almost prefers it that way; it’s more natural, healthy and Bucky’s definitely happier when he is not on a protein-heavy-carbs-are-evil diet).

_This_ is not Bucky looking at him with a blinding smile, an escaped hair strand falling in his face.

It’s the nervousness in the corners of that smile, the uncertainty that doesn’t quite manage to hide behind Bucky’s eyes.  _This_ is what gets Steve.  He knows how Bucky’s brave face looks like.  _This _ is a prime example.

“I’m not going to do anything you don’t want me to do”, Steve starts, looking Bucky directly in the eye, trying to convey how serious he is about that matter.

B ucky’s face shifts into a confused frown. “Yes. I know that. What makes you - ? Why? What are you planning on doing?”

“Nothing.” Steve says, puzzled by the reaction. “I just wanted… to make that clear, I guess? Because you looked like… and you know I know a bit about what happened with _him..._”

The sigh Bucky lets out is exasperated but fond. “One, you can use his name, he’s not you-know-who. Two,  he’s an asshole but he never made me do something against my will. Three, you’re so not him, there’s no way I’ll mistake you for him.” He adds a playful tone to his voice. “Four, we’re on a technically first date, I’ve got every right to be a bit nervous, that’s part of the experience.  You worry too much,  sweetie .”

Steve can’t help but to scan Bucky’s face for any sign of discomfort. He comes up empty. Either the grin is honest or Bucky has realized that he needs to put more effort in his mask to shield himself from Steve. Anyway Steve hopes that Bucky really is okay. It’s not like he can do something to help when Bucky  obviously  doesn’t want him to.  So Steve grins back at him.

“I can’t help it. Because you carry my heart with you, dearest.”

“Oh god”, Bucky groans as if in pain, “that’s horrible.”

Steve nods, awfully proud of not breaking into laughter at Bucky’s facial expressions. “It is. You don’t know half the horrors I go through every second you’re not by my side.”

Bucky looks up and shakes his head. “Please, darling. You know I gave you my heart when you gave me yours.” He is biting his lip but is somehow able to keep his face calm otherwise.

“Oh sugar”, Steve gets out, before his composure falters and he starts giggling like a five-year-old. He hears Bucky losing it, too. And for the first time today Steve thinks that this actually can be fun, this pretending to be a couple with Bucky. Not just something they have to go through to divert the public. He loves acting with Bucky, they always seem to find a natural rhythm with each other. It feels the same to Steve now. They might not have a script, but it would not be the first time they had to improvise.

“Promise me to never write a romance”, Bucky finally gets out and if fake dating him means that Steve gets to see him like this, beautiful with joy, Steve will never be able to regret having said _yes_ to this plan.

“Hey! You started it with the pet names!”, Steve exclaims in mock defense and grabs the menu. He actually is hungry.

“’cause that’s how I address people I’m in love with”, Bucky says lightly.

“Yeah, love you too, jerk.” Still ginning widely he opens the menu. “We probably should find something to order. I’m starving.”

“Yeah, sure, punk.”

The tone of  Bucky’s voice makes Steve look at him. “Are you okay?”

“Perfect.” Bucky smiles. It’s a bit strained. “I just think maybe we should try and take this a bit more serious, you know?”

“Hey, it’s going to be fine.” Steve himself is surprise how convinced he is about that. “I promise. I’ll act the shit out of this. Oscar-levels of performance.”

“As long as you don’t feel forced to go method”, is Bucky’s dry comment on the matter, picking up his menu and disappearing behind it. “Because I won’t be available for that.”

B ucky’s sweater is as soft as it looks. They have moved closer together for the pictures and Steve’s head is now resting on Bucky’s shoulder while Bucky takes a couple of selfies from different angles.

“Okay.” Bucky lowers his phone. “That should do it.”

Steve plucks it from his hand, viewing the photographs critically. They look like a couple, yes, but like they’re trying to convince the camera that they’re a happy couple. He looks at Bucky. “We can do better than that.”

Without giving Bucky the chance to protest, he motions at the  next  waitress  passing by their table. “Excuse me, could you maybe take a few pictures of us? If you find a minute? It doesn’t have to be right now, we’d just love to have something to remember this night and our selfies don’t do it justice.”

The waitress smiles and nods. “Not problem, sir. I’ll  ask my colleague, she’s better at taking photos than  me .”

“Thank you.” Steve hopes his smile is as honest as he means it. He hates troubling the restaurant staff for extra work but the selfie-approach obviously didn’t work out. He even has a couple of pictures of the yellow roses that decorate their table because he forgot to switch cameras on his phone. He doesn’t take many selfies. He has a mirror to know how he looks like and doesn’t need to see himself in a picture he took himself. He is in enough pictures as it is.

“What are you doing?”, Bucky whispers as the waitress leaves them.

“Getting a picture that hopefully looks more natural than the ones we’ve been taking.”

I t works. Having someone else taking pictures of them is something they’re both used to. Just as Steve had hoped, handing the camera to an outsider allows them to act like it isn’t there.  He lets himself drown in Bucky’s eyes for the moment. There are a few darker spots in the gr a y he’d never noticed before  and a hint of green, like they’re not blue-gray but turquoise-gray instead. Bucky’s fingers are warm between his, tangled on the table’s surface  until they’re not, until Steve feels his hand being lifted up and then feels lips brush over his knuckles. Bucky’s lips. Steve’s gaze drops down and gets caught in the tender smile that makes his heart feel funny. He only realizes that he’s moved in for a kiss, when Bucky leans back and effectively breaks the moment by thanking the waitress  and taking his phone back .

Feeling  his face heating up, Steve too retreats back on his side of the table. What the fuck happened there?

H e clears his throat as inconspicuous as possible before he even attempts to speak. “Can I see them?”

“Of course.” Bucky hands him the phone. Their fingers touch and it’s like electricity flows between them for those fractions of a second, which is ridiculous because they’ve been holding hands earlier and it had felt just fine.

Determined to not think about it further, especially not about how his hand is still tingling where Bucky touched it, Steve flicks through the pictures, forcing himself to focus on them. They are good. Very good. And the two people in them are indubitably very much in love with each other. Perfect.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they get asked questions and make up answers that are maybe more true than wanted.

This is it. Day one. Bucky feels like the cat that gets dragged out of its box by the vet, every instinct tells him to hold onto that door frame and never let go. Of course, that is not what would be considered _professional behavior._ And from the way Natasha keeps looking at him, he supposes that she knows exactly what he is thinking and will not hesitate to grab him by the scruff of the neck and personally drag him inside the hotel room that’s all set up for the first round of interviews. Under normal circumstances, that wouldn’t be so bad. Bucky enjoys talking about the Winter Soldier most of the time, he loves the character and joking around with his friends and colleagues. But this time it’s different.

They had posted one of the pictures from their date-that-wasn’t-a-real-date two days ago and the response was overwhelming. Thankfully mostly positive and supportive (although some people found it necessary to announce they’d be boycotting the _Captain America_ movies from now on). Still, it was a lot. Especially because Bucky had not expected it to hurt that much.

_They look so cute!_

_See? I’ve always said they belong together! Stucky is real!!!_

_Find someone who looks at you the way Steve Rogers looks at James Barnes_

Bucky had stopped reading after this last one and turned off his phone. He could still feel Steve’s warmth on his skin, feeling himself giving in and brush his lips over Steve’s knuckles, just the ghost of a kiss. That was not the moment the photo on the internet showed. No, that picture was takes moments after, when Steve had leaned towards Bucky like he was abut to kiss him for real. Which of course he wasn’t. This was nothing but a play. And Bucky hates himself for getting lost in the fantasy for a few seconds, believing that everything he saw in Steve’s eyes that moment was true, that it wasn’t just Steve acting. Unfortunately Steve was very good at his job and Bucky had just so avoided a kiss – his internal debate whether that was a good decision (not falling any deeper, no new material for his dreams) or a bad decision (not kissing Steve when he had the chance, no new material for his dreams; also Steve might be a horrible kisser and taste like old socks, which could have been a way for Bucky to convince himself that he does not want to do this ever again and therefore support him in finally getting rid of his ridiculous crush on Steve) is still ongoing. Reading about what a beautiful couple they make didn’t help at all. It just made him more aware of what he never would have but his heart longed for with all its might. Jesus, who was the one who should never write a romance, now?

“Hey!” The devil, or in this case Steve, appears in front of Bucky with a happy smile on his face and a cup of coffee in his hand.

Bucky manages a hopefully convincing smile in return. Judging from how Steve’s expression dims, he doesn’t do as good a job as he was aiming for.

“Is it about all this?”, Steve asks with a vague gesture through the room, his voice low enough that Bucky’s the only one who can hear him. “About posting the picture?”

Sensing where Steve is probably going with this line of questioning, Bucky interrupts, forcing as much levity as he can muster into his voice. “If you are about to ask if I’m regretting saying yes to this, I swear, I might consider putting an end to our relationship.” It comes out mostly exasperated, which is fine, too, in Bucky’s book.

“So you’re still okay with everything?”

Bucky sighs. “Yes. Stop worrying so much, you’ve got an adorable boyfriend and what smells like decent coffee. You should be on cloud nine.”

“Oh, actually, I got this one for you.” Steve shoves the coffee cup in Bucky’s hand. “I know how you hate the stuff they have at these things. It’s from across the street.”

“Thanks.” Surprised and unsure about what to do or say next, Bucky takes a sip. “Wow. That’s awesome.”

It might only be the light, but it looks like Steve is blushing. “I know and it’s -”

“Excuse me, would you mind moving your chat somewhere else, please?”, a voice to Bucky’s left asks and makes him realize that he is still standing in the door.

“Sorry, of course”, he says hastily and almost walks into Steve while trying to get out of the way.

“Thanks.” The man in the yellow shirt nods and disappears into the hall.

Bucky barely registers that because he is now standing so close to Steve that their shoulders are touching and Steve doesn’t seem inclined to take a step away anytime soon, which leaves Bucky trapped between him and getting in the way of everyone who wants to enter or exit the room. To distract himself from doing something stupid (like leaning closer) he takes another sip of his coffee. His favorite coffee. The coffee Steve bought him. Steve knows how Bucky prefers his coffee. Enough milk for foam, no sugar. But after spending months on sets with him, seeing him drink his weight in coffee, that doesn’t have to mean anything.

They are doing this round of interviews together, for which Bucky is grateful. These things are always more fun when you’re not alone with the questions. After the first few minutes of getting used to Steve’s presence, Bucky finds himself enjoying this more than he probably should. Steve notices the shift in his behavior and chalks it up to the caffeine. Which is not completely wrong, too, because it’s still relatively and Bucky needs an embarrassing amount of coffee to function in the morning. Which Steve is more than aware of.

By the time the first interviewer asks about the photo, Bucky feels weirdly comfortable sitting maybe an inch closer next to Steve than he normally would. They’re actors acting. They can do this.

“I love that picture”, Steve says with enthusiasm, before he places his hand on Bucky’s. Bucky is at this point absolutely in character as the actor James Barnes who is in love with and dating his co-star Steve Rogers, so it’s perfectly okay that his heart maybe beats a bit faster and he’s hyper-aware of the touch. Out of spite he turns his hand and intertwines his fingers with Steve’s. The action earns him a smile that is so soft Bucky can _feel_ his intestines melt into warm goo. He ignores the threat of becoming a happy puddle on the floor and smiles right back, not bothering with withholding his feelings for this man for a moment. It feels surprisingly good, like he is living his favorite dream. “And it felt right to share some of our happiness.”

“You do look very happy together”, the interviewer confirms. “So who asked out who?”

In comparison, that is one of the easier questions they get asked that day about them dating. It’s a story. In hindsight they maybe should have come up with something less domestic because some of the interviewers almost seem disappointed, but maybe that makes it more believable. Pizza and movies are definitely more relatable than something fancy like flying to Paris for the night and having a private tour through the Louvre. Although Steve would love the Louvre part of that.

Other questions are harder. “Can you tell us one of the reasons why you love your boyfriend?” for example. Or “When did you first realize you were in love with him?”, which is difficult because the whole thing with Brock is not yet buried deep enough to answer truthfully “while we were working on the first movie, he made me feel happy and safe enough to be myself around him.” Bucky listens to Steve’s answer “when he came to set one morning very early and half-asleep – it’s impossible not to fall in love with the way his face lights up when he gets handed a cup of good coffee” with the plan to just nod and agree. But thanks to Steve being all sweet and detailed with it, that doesn’t work that well. Fortunately Bucky has a lot of moments that made him realize just how deep he was in to chose from. He settles on talking about how Steve left him small notes on set, when Steve had a week off while Bucky as the Winter Soldier was assassinating people at night. It’s a good story because it seems very romantic and considerate for everyone who does not know the exact contents of those notes: sketches of Steve or Captain America sleeping or lying on a bed or a sofa reading or watching a movie. Steve could put a lot of effort into being an asshole if he wanted to. Obviously he found making Bucky even more miserable over night shoots a worthy cause. Bucky’s resentment however wasn’t big enough to not keep those little scraps of paper.

The look Steve gives him is surprised, but he doesn’t comment.

Not until they’re finally almost done for the day that is.

“You remember those notes I left you”, Steve says a bit too casual and focused on chasing peas over his plate. They have retreated into Bucky’s room for the evening, not in the mood for more social interaction than absolutely necessary.

Bucky watches one of the peas trying to escape onto his bed. “Yes, of course.”

“Why?”

“Why what, Steve?” Bucky looks up.

Steve is still staring at his food. “Why did you chose that as the moment you fell in love with me? I mean -”, he starts panicking, red spreading out over his cheeks.

“I know what you mean.” Bucky puts a hand on Steve’s shoulder in an attempt to calm him down. He can feel Steve relax into the touch. “I don’t know. It was the first thing that came to mind? And you’ve gotta admit, with a different message those notes would have been pretty cute. Like what you said about me and coffee in the morning.”

Steve finally looks up and for a second it seems like he is about to say something important, but then he just smiles, soft and a tiny bit uncertain around the edges. “Come on, we’ve got a newlywed quiz to prepare for.”

Right, that’s the plan for tomorrow. Bucky nods and collects the dishes from the bed, wondering what Steve had wanted to say before he changed his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not happy with this chapter. I hope that's only because I'm really excited about the next one.

**Author's Note:**

> Any notes? Constructive criticism?


End file.
